What about a child who gets pregnant in high school or even middle school? She would have to drop out of school, so do you think she should still have to give birth?
University of New Mexico, March 2026
What about a woman who has been raped? She didn’t ask for that, so how can you say she should be forced to remain pregnant? The justice system fails sometimes, and children born into these environments will just suffer. What about foster care and all the suffering there? Children shouldn’t have to live in bad environments. What about people living in communist dictatorships where the child will suffer under oppression? Some people don’t want to have a child at all, so why can’t abortion be an option?
Recently, a young Christian woman reached out to me on Instagram and asked me questions like these. Here’s how I responded:
Rebekah: These are great questions. They do raise some hard things. I agree with you that children shouldn’t be having children. When you have a young child in middle school or high school, and she is pregnant, that’s really tough. If it’s because of rape that’s even harder. You’re right that the justice system often fails women who have been raped, and that’s awful. You’re also right that foster care can be a horrible place for some children, and that’s so sad. And all the hard things about living under communism are totally tragic. I think our words around this and how we talk about it matters because this can be so fraught with pain and trauma for so many people.
Holding all that in one hand though, I think we need to balance on the other hand the dignity and value of the unborn child. So perhaps a question that would be helpful for you to think through is, ‘Should people be allowed to kill a human in the womb because of difficult circumstances they face?’
Think of it this way: imagine there is a woman who was raped, and she got pregnant, and she gave birth recently. Now let’s say that her child is going to be put into foster care and will suffer there. What if someone said she shouldn’t have to be a mother, and the child is going to suffer in foster care. Should she have the choice to kill her infant because of the assault and because of the suffering the child will experience? Of course not. So if the unborn in the woman’s womb is human like a born child, then all these difficult, tragic circumstances, while they matter, don’t justify ending the life of another innocent image bearer of God. If abortion does not kill a human being, then abortion should be allowed. But if it really does kill a human being it should not be allowed. The idea that we can kill other humans because life is really hard is really dangerous.
Young woman: I agree they are human, but I am confused because it is horrible to end a life, but wouldn’t it also be horrible for a child to live a bad life? I don’t think you should be able to take a life, but I just don’t see how that would be worse than giving birth and then having the child experience trauma.
Rebekah: I agree it’s horrible when a child grows up in an environment that’s abusive and where she doesn’t get the care she deserves. It sounds like you are wrestling with this question: Wouldn’t it be better that someone dies than live a life of suffering and pain? If a human is going to suffer and have traumatic experiences, is it better to end her life before these experiences happen? What do you think God says about this?
So many Christians have a view of human suffering that is not informed by Scripture. I had similar exchanges with some Christians at San Diego State University and MiraCosta College in February. Thinking it is justified to take the life of another human being because they are going to suffer is a lie from Satan that too many Christians believe. It is a dangerous lie because it’s couched in compassion and concern for others, but it violates the commandment to not take away the most precious thing someone has: her life. Satan is the father of lies, and what’s lurking behind this view of suffering is the belief that some humans are better off dead. It is such a privileged position to look at another’s suffering and make the judgment, “Her life isn’t worth living. Someone else should decide if she lives or dies.” It’s a lie. This is not the way of Jesus.
I understand and believe that to depart and be with Jesus is far better, as Paul says in Philippians. But that mindset needs to also be held in tension with the knowledge that God is the author of life; He gives, and He takes away. That is His prerogative, not ours. We are clearly told not to take the lives of innocent human beings.
As Christians, our mindset toward these kinds of situations should be something like this: I love you. I’m with you. God is with you. You are not alone. I may not understand why this particular suffering has afflicted you, but God will not leave you. You matter even in this pain. I will seek to alleviate your suffering and pain in the ways that I can, but I will not dare raise a hand against another image bearer of God and take away her life.
God’s light shines in these dark places. His truth guides us in how to answer these questions.